A sunbeam. Most people think of a ray of light, but I think
of a familiar primary song J
Now of course I can’t teach that song
to my kids, or I’ll risk getting sent home. SO! I changed the words, and it’s
still they’re favorite song! J
(Let’s all pretend we’re a sunbeam, and shine so bright each day. In every way
let’s be happy, at home at work at play. A sunbeam, a sunbeam, let’s all pretend
we’re a sunbeam. A sunbeam, a sunbeam, I’ll be a sunbeam today). A sun beam is
just a small portion of a great light source; one that can warm the entire
earth and provide nutrients for numberless life forms. A sunbeam is like an
example of the sun. Since you can’t handle the full sun, you get to experience
just a small portion that can warm your skin…or your heart!
That brings
me to my next point. I think I’ve been a rather dull sunbeam lately. When I came
to China, I had expectations, and I have come to a novel conclusion (at least I think its novel haha).
If you spend all your time trying to make your situation
match your expectation, you unavoidably prevent reality from influencing you
positively, therefore robbing yourself of a situation that would surpass your
expectations.
The
story behind it: Here I am, in freaking China, and all I can seem to get done
is minimal because I keep trying to make my experience here what I expected it
to be. I expected a third world experience, with dirt floors, walking a mile or
two to school every day, and poor children starving for knowledge. Instead I
live in a city, much like Seattle. They have AC, and life is normal. My
children are 50million times more rich than my family (and that’s ALMOST not an
exaggeration….), and I walk 8 minutes to get to school. I have a supermarket
that’s like a walmart right down the road with everything I need, and I’m now a
master at taxis and the subway. I am so busy, I haven’t seen much of China, and
I keep trying to force myself to go without things so it will be more like what
I imagined.
WHAT
THE HECK AM I DOING?!?! The world grew up and I stayed naïve….hahaha.
I have an amazing ward, and the sisters need to go back to
the states and teach everyone how it’s done. I realized I need to be more
proactive in accepting the modern changes that China has undergone, and start
learning how to be better at taking advantage of opportunities. I keep beating
myself up because I haven’t traveled very much, and I stay at home on weekends….but
then I realize I never have an empty moment when I stay home. I’m always
working on something, or attending ward activities, or helping someone. THAT’S
OKAY! Yeah I still want to travel, and I have every intention of doing so, but
beating myself up over not getting the experience I expected is…..preventing me
from getting an experience worth getting! I have travel plans, yes. I have
cooking plans, yes! (I’ve learned how to create some of the AMAZING vegetable
dishes here!). And I have a new plan to delve myself into the language. I know enough
to get me around, but I want to actually learn it.
My real
goal is to enjoy what I have, and take advantage of what’s here. Everything is
modern, so it’s really hard to really experience the culture like I wanted to,
but I’m going to try, and enjoy what I get to. Time to be a brighter sunbeam J
Well said Blythe ;)
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